"What do you expect from me/What am I not giving you/What could I do for you/To make me okay in your eyes"
Why do I need everyone to like me? To approve of me? Why do I avoid conflict of any kind? Why can't I just let my anger out and actually scream at someone who has hurt me???
Maybe this is part of the reason why I am still friends with Brenda. Why I hide my smoking from my parents at 27 years old, and why I never confront anyone who has hurt me, like Todd for instance.
I'm a pushover... you walk all over me, pour salt in my wounds or backstab me and I'll smile at you with tears in my eyes and say thank you very much.
I hate this part of me. This craving for approval and acceptance that is deeply rooted inside. Why can't I just wake up some morning, and give some jerk in my life a piece of my mind or an ass kicking? I think it would be quite a stress reliever...
But oh no.. not me...
Seriously...
Hurt me, break my heart and I'll ask you if there is anything else I can do for you, if maybe you would like me to kiss your ass for you...
Anything you want...
Just please like me.
Almost too much - March 24, 2006
Contact... Oh God - March 22, 2006
Life is cruel - March 02, 2006
Todd's Back... - September 03, 2005
still here - February 12, 2005
I feeltoday